


Today Is Not The Right Day For This

by Lady_Blade_WarAngel



Series: Adventures of The Crazy [8]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Childbirth, F/M, Fainting, Fluff and Crack, Pregnancy, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-06
Updated: 2015-01-06
Packaged: 2018-03-06 07:56:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3126971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Blade_WarAngel/pseuds/Lady_Blade_WarAngel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brienne is angry and frustrated. Her pregnancy hormones are all out of control. Jaime and Tywin interfere in Brienne's daily routines. Tyrion gets news. The kids manage to get on for once.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Today Is Not The Right Day For This

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so here is the next part of the story. I hope you all enjoy it. Thanks to everyone who is leaving me kudos on this series. I really appreciate it.

Today Is Not The Right Day For This.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

Brienne was angry, incredibly frustrated and she was tempted to kill her husband. This was the umpteenth time today Brienne had gone to get up and get something (be it from the printer, or a simple cup of coffee) and someone had appeared from nowhere with her paperwork, or a cup of tea (She was getting sick of tea), or offering to go and get her something she was looking for. This time she had gotten up to go and get a chocolate bar. She’d been craving a Crunchie. She normally hated them, but obviously, her pregnancy cravings were getting the better of her. It was Tyrion who arrived before she got out of her seat. Not that that was too difficult for anyone to do now. She couldn’t remember feeling so enormous when she had the twins, and it felt like she was carrying twenty times her weight.

“Tyrion, if you are here to offer me help of any kind, I really suggest that you _don’t_.” Brienne stated firmly. Tyrion shrugged.

“Actually I was going to offer you a Crunchie. You seem obsessed with them since you got all those crazy cravings.” Tyrion replied. That was when Pod appeared with another cup of tea.

“Pod? _Why_ do you keep bringing me tea? You’re my _personal assistant!_ You _know_ I _hate_ tea! Why are you brining me the _hundredth_ cup of tea today?” Brienne exclaimed. Pod started to stammer and looked rather terrified.

“Mrs Lannister... it’s the tenth cup.” Pod managed to stammer out.

“I don’t actually care about the precise number Podrick Payne! I’m going to look like a cursed tea bag before this month is over!” Brienne exploded. Tyrion sighed.

“Don’t blame him Brienne. Jaime told everyone you’re not allowed to drink coffee, remember? What with your pregnancy and your blood pressure.” Tyrion said. Brienne finally got up from her seat and glared down at both Tyrion and Podrick.

“I am _not_ a baby! I am capable of making my own decisions and my own drinks! I’m also capable of going to the printer and picking up my own paperwork!” Brienne yelled.

“That was father.” Cersei stated as she walked past the office, completely unfazed by Brienne’s furious temper. Of course this made Brienne even more furious.

“What?” Brienne asked. Tyrion sighed again.

“After Christmas when you passed out, well... father has insisted on all the heavy lifting being done for you. No risks for you or the newest little Lannister.” Tyrion replied. Brienne snatched the Crunchie that Tyrion was holding out in a placating gesture. Then she grabbed her bag and her coat and looked at Tyrion and Pod.

“I am going _home_ and you can tell Jaime that if he knows what is good for him, he had better not follow me, or I might just murder him. As for your father, I might murder him anyway.” Brienne stated coolly. Then she walked out of her office and went to the lift and pressed the button for the ground floor. As she waited for the lift doors to open, she jabbed at the button impatiently, taking out some of her frustration on the innocent object. As soon as it arrived, she stomped into the lift, and the doors closed before anyone could even think to ask her if she was alright. As the lift went down, Brienne ripped open the Crunchie bar viciously, and began to eat it, taking her anger out on the chocolate. Of course, it was gone too soon to completely abate Brienne’s anger. She would have taken Jaime’s car keys before she left, but she couldn’t get behind the wheel of any car at the moment, with her huge stomach. So she decided to flag down a taxi.

“Aunt Brienne?” Brienne wasn’t sure whether she wanted to yell, cry, or be happy about seeing Joffrey standing at her side all of a sudden.

“Joffrey?” Brienne questioned back, wondering if he was in a good mood or a bad one.

“What are you doing?” Joffrey asked. Brienne sighed.

“I’m flagging down a taxi Joffrey. What does it look like I’m doing?” Brienne shot back. Joffrey looked slightly hurt by her tone. “I’m sorry Joffrey. I don’t mean to take my bad mood out on you.” Brienne said grudgingly. After all, her mood was not Joffrey’s fault. He hadn’t actually done anything wrong... yet.

“Well I’m going to a meeting across town. It’s the first time Grandfather is allowing me to go alone. I could always drop you at home on my way. You are pregnant, and after what happened at Christmas...” Joffrey trailed off. Brienne couldn’t blame anyone for being worried. She had collapsed in the middle of Christmas dinner. The twins had been solemn for a month afterwards, not wanting to do anything that might upset her in any way. Arianne and Galladon had both been walking on eggshells for the whole pregnancy, scared to push their mother’s blood pressure through the roof and send her back to hospital. Even Cersei and Joffrey’s behaviour around her had been exemplary. Which had been shocking. Usually Joffrey was rude and condescending to everyone, which was one of the huge reasons that he didn’t get on with his cousins or his siblings. His comment about poor Joy at Christmas, that had caused the brawl between him and Galladon in the first place, was proof of that. Though Joffrey always called her Aunt Brienne, even though he always acted like he was so much better than everyone else. Sometimes, Brienne wondered how much of his attitude belonged to him, and how much belonged to his idea of how his mother expected him to behave.

“Alright Joffrey. I would appreciate a lift home. It will save me yelling for a taxi at any rate.” Brienne agreed. One thing she knew was that Joffrey was a careful driver, despite his apparent rudeness. Tywin had brought him a rather nice, expensive car, a Mercedes Benz convertible, to be exact. It had been a birthday present that had been given to Joffrey, about six months after he’d passed his test. Tywin was not the kind of man to buy an expensive car for an impulsive driver. He believed firmly in giving what was earned, so to earn that car, Joffrey had to have proven he was adept behind the wheel of one. Brienne followed Joffrey to his car and got in, belting up, despite how huge and squashed she felt. She’d been feeling uncomfortable all day, suffering from twinges of pain in her lower back and stomach every so often. But Brienne knew she wasn’t due to give birth for another month. That and with all the weird stuff she’d been eating (not including the Crunchie’s, she’d been drinking mango juice by the crates, eating lemons raw and ate sushi at least once a day because she craved these things constantly), that she probably had indigestion. She simply wanted to go home, lie down, and take a nap. Arianne was going to pick up the twins from school, and Galladon was going to go with her. The secondary and primary schools weren’t that far away from each other, or far from the house, so Brienne didn’t have to worry about them walking home together. It was as they hit a pothole in the road that Brienne felt it. A sharp, all encompassing pain, that spread over her whole stomach. Then she felt the slightest trickle of something dribbling down her leg, and she started to panic inwardly. Outwardly she looked at Joffrey. “I need to go to the hospital Joffrey.” Brienne stated, sounding far calmer than she actually felt. Joffrey looked at her quizzically. “My water just broke. I’m going to have this baby and pretty soon. So unless you want me to deliver in your car, I suggest you get me to the hospital.” Brienne added. Joffrey’s green eyes went wide, and then he made a U turn and headed towards the hospital.

“I’ll call Uncle Jaime when we get there.” Joffrey stated. For once, there were no arguments, or snide comments. There wasn’t even a worry about the upholstery of his car, like there would be for anything else usually. Joffrey just drove as fast as he could go, straight to the hospital.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

Jaime glared at Tyrion, as his younger brother related the whole story.

“She’s been in a terrible mood all day. She’s been pretty good about the tea drinking, because she knows she can’t have coffee. But today she’s just been... I don’t know... impossible. I tried to get her to take the day off today, she just yelled at me that when she was ready to quit her job and be a fifties housewife, she’d let me know.” Jaime said. Tyrion nodded.

“Are you sure she’s not due for another month?” Tyrion asked. Jaime nodded.

“Yeah the doctor confirmed it at her last scan. We decided not to learn the baby’s sex until it’s born of course. Brienne wanted it to be a surprise.” Jaime said.

“Have you both got names picked out yet?” Tyrion asked. Jaime shrugged.

“She wants Lyanna for a girl. I said I want Arthur for a boy. We’ve kinda agreed on that.” Jaime replied. That was when he got a call on his mobile. He frowned as he looked at it.

“Who is it?” Tyrion asked.

“It’s Joffrey. He never calls me.” Jaime said. He answered the phone “Joffrey? What’s going on?” Jaime asked. As he listened to the quick, half panicked explanation, Jaime went white as a sheet. “Joffrey, calm down. You did the right thing. I will be there as quickly as I can Joffrey. Tell her I’m on my way.” Jaime said, then he hung up.

“What’s wrong?” Tyrion asked.

“It’s Brienne. She’s gone into labour. Joffrey saw her trying to flag down a taxi and offered her a lift. On the way home, she said she was in labour and to take her to a hospital. He called me as soon as he got her there apparently.” Jaime said, as he grabbed his coat, his various other objects and finally his phone and car keys. He looked at Tyrion. “Can you go and take care of the kids Tyrion? I know I’m asking a lot on short notice, but-” Jaime tried to ask, but Tyrion cut him off.

“Of course I’ll go and look after the kids. I’ll be a regular Betty Crocker and order in some take out.” Tyrion replied. Jaime nodded.

“Let father know what’s going on. I can’t stop to find him at the moment. He’s not in his office. He might be in a meeting on the fourth floor. Also, cancel Joffrey’s meeting. He won’t make it in time, and it’s not his fault.” Jaime said. Tyrion nodded and Jaime was out of the office door and into the lift. Then he was gone and Tyrion shrugged to himself and pulled out his mobile phone. He tapped the phone and then held it to his ear.

 _“Hello?”_ Tyrion grinned at the female voice.

“Margaery? I have to cancel our dinner date tonight.” Tyrion said.

 _“What? Why?”_ Margaery asked.

“Brienne’s gone into labour. The baby’s early and Jaime asked me to look after the kids.” Tyrion answered.

 _“Oh my God! Is she okay?”_ Margaery asked.

“I don’t know. Jaime has gone to meet her at the hospital now.” Tyrion replied.

 _“Wasn’t he with her?”_ Margaery asked. Tyrion sighed and explained the whole story. He heard Margaery sigh on the other end of the call. _“I hope I don’t get like that.”_ Margaery said softly.

“What?” Tyrion asked, completely confused.

 _“Well, seeing as we’re not having dinner tonight, I might as well tell you now. I’m pregnant. You can think of some names if you like, but I get three vetoes.”_ Margaery replied. Tyrion wasn’t quite sure what happened after that. He may have passed out, because the next thing he knew, Podrick was shaking his shoulder gently, and he was lying on the carpeted floor of Jaime’s office. He looked at his phone, Margaery was still on the line. He looked at Podrick.

“Podrick, I need you to find my father, tell him that Brienne has gone into labour. Joffrey dropped her at the hospital and won’t be able to make the meeting and Jaime has just left to go and be with her.” Tyrion told Pod. Pod nodded and ran off. Tyrion then grabbed his phone. “Are you still there Margaery?” Tyrion asked.

 _“I am indeed. Did you faint, little man?”_ Margaery asked. Tyrion sighed.

“I honestly don’t know.” Tyrion replied. To this, Margaery laughed and Tyrion was still deeply shocked.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

Joffrey looked terrified as Brienne glared at the nurses.

“Joffrey, sit down and calm down. You’d think you were the one having a baby.” Brienne stated. Joffrey went wide eyed, his mouth agape, as he simply did as he was told. Brienne looked at the nurse. “My husband is on his way. Jaime Lannister. When he gets here I want to be sure that he’s let in.” Brienne stated. Her earlier anger with Jaime was basically forgotten. The nurse nodded, also looking rather frightened. Then she left the room like a startled stoat. Her name tag had read ‘Nurse Amerei Frey’ and she had tried to flirt with Joffrey quite a bit since they had got to the hospital, about forty five minutes ago. Joffrey seemed endlessly uncomfortable with the attention. He looked at Brienne warily and she could see he had no idea what to say or do. That was when a doctor finally came in. Doctor Alysane Mormont had a bright smile and seemed rough and ready, and Brienne liked her instantly.

“Now, let’s take a look and see how far you’re dilated.” Doctor Mormont said. Joffrey went white as a sheet.

“It’s alright Joffrey. You can leave the room if you want to.” Brienne said, taking pity on him. He was nineteen years old, and rather terrified of what he thought may be about to happen. Joffrey shook his head stubbornly and turned to face the wall of the room.

“Uncle Jaime told me to stay with you until he got here.” Joffrey said. Brienne did not have the energy to argue the point with him. Besides which he was trying to help, in his own, rather strange, way. After Doctor Mormont took a look, she looked up at Brienne.

“How long have you been having pains Mrs Lannister?” Doctor Mormont asked.

“All day. I just thought it was indigestion. At my last scan, the nurse said the baby wasn’t due for at least a month.” Brienne replied. Doctor Mormont looked a little pale herself.

“Mrs Lannister, the baby is crowning. You’re going to have to start pushing.” The doctor said. Brienne clenched her fists and shook her head.

“My husband isn’t here yet.” Brienne said. It sounded childish, even to her, but she needed Jaime. She also knew that she couldn’t exactly stop the baby coming. Joffrey had spun around as soon as the doctor had said that the baby was coming now. His face, usually full of arrogance and self importance, was full of fear and confusion. He didn’t know what to do at all. That was when the door opened and Jaime arrived. Joffrey looked as relieved as Brienne felt.

“I’m sorry it took me so long.” Jaime said.

“We haven’t even been here an hour Jaime.” Brienne tried to reassure him. Jaime frowned.

“That’s not the point. The traffic is awful. There’s been some stupid accident at the roundabout near Baelor’s Park. That’s why it took so long.” Jaime said. Brienne nodded and then gritted her teeth as she felt another pain.

“Now Mrs Lannister, is it alright for us to take you to the delivery room?” Doctor Mormont asked cheerfully. Brienne nodded and Jaime blinked in confusion.

“Apparently this baby wasn’t going to wait. It still isn’t.” Brienne answered Jaime’s unasked question. Jaime looked at Joffrey, who still looked a little pale.

“Mr Lannister I’m just going to go and tell them it’s time take your wife down to delivery.” The doctor said.

“I’ll be going with her.” Jaime stated.

“Of course Mr Lannister.” Doctor Mormont said. Then she left the room. Joffrey looked at Jaime and Brienne.

“Thank you Joffrey. You’ve really been a great help today.” Jaime said to him. Joffrey nodded his understanding.

“I’ll... I’ll wait outside if that’s alright Uncle Jaime.” Joffrey asked. Jaime nodded.

“That’s fine Joff.” Jaime said.

“Joffrey?” Joffrey looked at Brienne. “Thank you. For offering me a lift in the first place, for bringing me to the hospital and for waiting here with me.” Brienne told him. Joffrey nodded and left the room, closing the door behind him.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were having pains?” Jaime asked gently.

“I thought it was indigestion.” Brienne replied. “Although thinking about it, I should know better. I don’t know what was going through my head. I should have known it was time.” Brienne added.

“You can’t know everything Brienne. No one can know everything.” Jaime said. Brienne gripped hold of Jaime’s hand and squeezed as another pain hit her. Jaime winced. He would never get used to how strong Brienne’s grip was. He could have sworn that Brienne broke all the bones in his hand when Arianne had come screaming into the world.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

When Arianne and Galladon arrived home from school with the twins, they were surprised to see their Uncle Tyrion’s car in the driveway.

“What’s going on Gal?” Joanna asked her older brother as they walked up to the front door. Alysanne remained, wisely, silent. Arianne pulled the keys out of her pocket and they jangled like crazy as she put them in the lock and turned them.

“Why do you have so many key rings Arianne? Seriously, if someone was burgling the house they’d get at least three minutes warning to get out, from the noise of your keys alone!” Galladon stated. Arianne glared at her younger brother as she finally got the door open. She looked at the twins and her brother.

“Out of your uniforms. It’s Friday, so just bring them down and I’ll put the laundry on in a few minutes.” Arianne stated. The twins ran off up the stairs and Galladon gave Arianne a strange look. She closed the front door then turned to look at Galladon, who was still staring. “What?” Arianne asked as Galladon seemed far too quiet.

“Nothing. You just sounded way too much like Mum then.” Galladon said. Arianne shrugged.

“She is my Mum too you know.” Arianne replied. They went into the living room, where they found their uncle, sitting on a chair. “What’s going on Uncle Tyrion?” Arianne asked directly.

“Your mother has gone into labour. Your father is with her at the hospital, and from what he said when he called me, about ten minutes ago, the baby will be coming any minute, apparently.” Tyrion said. Galladon frowned.

“You seem a little too shell-shocked to just be worrying about our Mum.” Galladon said. Arianne rolled her eyes at her little brother.

“Today is not the right day for this Gal.” Arianne stated.

“Margaery is pregnant.” Tyrion said. Arianne and Galladon stared at their Uncle.

“I could have told you that a week ago when I went shopping with her.” Arianne replied.

“How?” Both Tyrion and Galladon asked at the same moment.

“She kept needing to go to the bathroom, she also wanted to stop three times to eat. I only ever know Mum to be that hungry when she’s pregnant, and Auntie Margaery is never usually one to stuff her face. That and the fact that she’s put on some weight. Everything she tried on was too tight, even for Margaery. So it was easy to figure out. Why is it bugging you so much?” Arianne asked. Tyrion went wide eyed.

“Yeah Uncle Tyrion, and why did Aunt Margaery tell _you_ first?” Galladon asked.

“How could you possibly know she told me first?” Tyrion shot back.

“If she’d told Grammy Olenna, then Grammy would have told the whole world, same with the rest of her family. Seeing as this is the first time we’re hearing the words spoken, it stands to reason that you were the first one she told.” Arianne replied. Galladon nodded his agreement. Tyrion sighed.

“I’m the father. Do _not_ make judgements. Also, the fact I’m telling you two is ridiculous. You’re fifteen!” Tyrion exclaimed, pointing at Arianne. “And you’re twelve!” Tyrion added, pointing at Galladon. “And I have no idea why we’re having this conversation!” Tyrion finished, his arms flailing about. Arianne and Galladon both shrugged.

“It could be because you basically trained us to be your smart minions, hoping you weren’t going to produce any progeny.” Galladon said.

“Or the fact that, apart from Dad, and Bronn, and Podrick, we’re basically your best friends. You’d never tell Bronn first, because you don’t want to be mocked. Podrick is too quiet and would probably be afraid of saying something to upset you. Dad’s at the hospital. That leaves us.” Arianne added.

“You’re both too smart for your own good. Go and change out of your uniforms and check on the twins. They’re being awfully quiet.” Tyrion replied. This made Arianne and Galladon blink, and then run off up the stairs to check on their younger siblings. After all, when children were being quiet they were almost always up to something they shouldn’t be. That was the golden rule of dealing with small children.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

“I _hate_ you Jaime Lannister! If I could get out of this bed, I would crush your head like a grape! _With my bare hands!_ ” Brienne yelled as the doctor told her to push. Jaime knew better than to answer to that. So he stayed silent, apart from the wincing when Brienne crushed his hand, instead of his head.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

Joffrey was sat outside the delivery room, trying to ignore the yelling and screaming from inside.

 _“Uncle Tyrion actually has the right idea. I don’t need children. I don’t want any. No woman is ever going to trick me into having children. It’s not going to happen. I don’t want to have my head squashed like a grape.”_ Joffrey thought to himself. That was when he heard the cry of a baby. After about ten minutes, Joffrey saw his Uncle Jaime open the door, holding a bundle in his arms.

“Would you like to hold him?” Jaime asked. Joffrey wasn’t sure how to answer. But he knew this was something that would happen rarely, so he hesitantly held out his arms, afraid to stand up and drop the tiny bundle. Jaime placed the baby in Joffrey’s arms, and Joffrey thought that for something so small, it weighed more than he thought it would.

“He’s... heavier than I thought he’d be.” Joffrey said absently.

“All babies are Joffrey. You’ll find out when you have your own.” Jaime said. Joffrey looked down at the snuffling, golden haired baby, and thought to himself.

 _“Maybe babies wouldn’t be_ so _bad.”_ Joffrey handed the baby back to Jaime. “What’s his name?” Joffrey asked.

“Arthur. His name is Arthur Joffrey Lannister.” Jaime said. Joffrey couldn’t help the strangest, warm, tingling feeling, that seemed to be building up in his chest as he looked at the small baby.

“I’ll... go and tell Arianne and Galladon what’s happening if you want Uncle. That way you can call them when you’re on your way home.” Joffrey said. He wasn’t sure what had made him offer, but he did. Jaime patted Joffrey on the shoulder and nodded.

“That might be a good idea.” Jaime said. Joffrey nodded, passed baby Arthur back to Jaime, and left the hospital.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

It was about six o clock when there was a knock at the front door. Arianne got up to go and answer it and yelled in shock.

“Joffrey? What are you doing here?” Arianne yelled. Galladon and Tyrion both got up and saw Joffrey standing in the doorway.

“You do know he took your mother to the hospital, right?” Tyrion asked. Arianne blinked.

“No. I didn’t actually. You might’ve told us Uncle Tyrion.” Arianne replied. Then she looked at Joffrey. “Is my mother okay?” She asked.

“She’s fine. You’ve got a little brother.” Joffrey said.

“Arthur. Wow, there’s going to be another boy in the house. That feels weird.” Galladon stated. Arianne looked at her older cousin, who seemed a little rumpled and tired, and not at all like his normal, condescending, put together self.

“Do you want to come in Joffrey? Uncle Tyrion is ordering pizza, and you look like you could use a break.” Arianne said. Joffrey blinked and looked at Arianne carefully. “Don’t get it twisted. I’m sure we’ll be back to arguing soon enough, because you can’t stop being a jerk nine times out of ten. But right now, you did something good for my Mum and you’re not being a jerk. So... pizza?” Arianne asked. Joffrey shrugged.

“Sure. Why not?” Joffrey said. He stepped inside the house and for once, there were no arguments. Which was music to Tyrion’s ears.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

Jaime frowned as the doctor spoke to them. It was about nine o clock at night.

“Are you saying that my wife is in some kind of danger?” Jaime asked. The doctor shook her head.

“No of course not Mr Lannister. I’m saying that because her blood pressure is quite high at the moment, that we would like to keep her overnight so we can monitor her, and make sure there are no complications.” The doctor said.

“It’s alright Doctor Mormont. I’m just worried about my other children.” Brienne said. The doctor nodded her understanding. “Is Arthur alright?” Brienne asked. The doctor nodded.

“He’s perfectly alright. He’s fit and healthy. He’s a little small, but I’m sure he’ll have gained weight by the time you’re ready to go for his first check up in a couple of weeks.” The doctor replied. Then she left the room, leaving Jaime and Brienne alone. She was holding Arthur now, smiling down at him.

“Jaime, you should go home and be with the kids. They’re probably worried sick and you’re exhausted.” Brienne said softly. Jaime gave Brienne a slightly irritated look.

“There is no way I’m leaving you in the hospital alone, after you have just given birth.” Jaime replied. Brienne sighed.

“Will Tyrion be alright to stay with them?” Brienne asked. Jaime nodded.

“It shouldn’t be a problem. I’ll just give him a ring, and talk to the kids and Tyrion.” Jaime said. Brienne nodded and gestured to the seat beside her bed. That was when the nurse came in. It wasn’t Amerei Frey, it was another nurse. Her name tag read Nurse Roslin Frey.

“How many Freys work in this hospital?” Brienne asked.

“Twenty two, Mrs Lannister. A lot of us went into nursing. You had Amerei earlier. She’s my niece, believe it or not.” Roslin said softly. Jaime blinked.

“Your father is Walder Frey, I’m assuming.” Jaime stated. The nurse nodded.

“Yes. Hopefully that will not be something that you judge me on Mr Lannister.” Roslin said.

“No, of course not.” Jaime said, honestly. Roslin Frey was not so handsy as Amerei after all, and she seemed very genuine. Roslin checked Brienne’s blood pressure, whilst Jaime held Arthur.

“It’s a little high still. But hopefully, by tomorrow morning it’ll be back to normal. So long as you get a good night’s rest that is.” Roslin said. Brienne nodded, and Roslin left them alone. Jaime handed Arthur back to Brienne and sat down in the seat by her bed. He pulled out his phone, ringing Tyrion. He hoped that the kids weren’t worrying too much.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

It was about nine thirty, when Tyrion’s phone rang. Tyrion picked it up as soon as he saw Jaime’s name flashing across the screen.

“Jaime? Is everything alright?” Tyrion asked. Joffrey had just eaten some of the pizza that Tyrion had bought for dinner, and for once, Arianne, Galladon and Joffrey were getting on well enough. The twins were in their room, watching _Frozen_ , for what might have been the millionth time. Tyrion sighed with relief as he listened to what Jaime had to say. He looked at Arianne and Galladon. “Do you two want to talk to your father?” Tyrion asked.

“Is Mum okay?” Galladon asked. Tyrion nodded.

“Yes, they’re keeping her overnight because her blood pressure is high. But a nurse came to check it about five minutes ago, and it’s calming down. The doctor said that she should be fine to leave the hospital in the morning, as long as she gets a good night’s rest. I’ll be staying with you tonight, of course.” Tyrion said. Arianne and Galladon both sighed with relief.

“It’s okay Uncle Tyrion. Dad should be with Mum and Arthur. I’ll go and tell the twins that Mum will be coming home tomorrow. At least it’s Saturday, so I won’t have to make them get up to go to school.” Arianne said. Then she was off, up the stairs, calling for her little sisters. Galladon nodded his agreement.

“We’ll see them both tomorrow.” Galladon said. Tyrion nodded and confirmed everything with Jaime, before ending the call. Then he looked at Joffrey, who seemed just slightly relieved, himself.

“Joffrey, have you got work tomorrow?” Tyrion asked. Joffrey shook his head.

“No. Grandfather called me and said I’d earned a day off.” Joffrey replied. Galladon nodded his agreement. This must have happened when Tyrion was out of the room at one point or another.

“Well, it might be better if you sleep here tonight and go home tomorrow. You look tired.” Tyrion said. Joffrey nodded as he attempted to stifle a yawn. Galladon shrugged.

“You can borrow a pair of my pyjamas if you like. They’ll fit you, what with me being taller.” Galladon said. Joffrey shrugged and just followed Galladon upstairs. Tyrion just sat back in his seat and looked at his phone. Then he typed out a text to Margaery.

**What do you think of the name Genna for a girl?**

He sent it, and within a few moments received a reply.

**Not bad. I was expecting you to ask for a name like Myrielle or Cerenna or Tytos. Something so very Westerlands. Genna is quite tame.**

Tyrion allowed a smile to cross his lips. Maybe being a parent would not be as bad as he thought it would be.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

It was maybe three or four in the morning. Jaime looked down at his golden haired son, while Brienne lay sleeping. He didn’t want to have to wake her up if it wasn’t necessary. He used one finger to stroke the baby’s tiny face.

“Well Arthur, welcome to the family. I’d say we’re dysfunctional, but I’m sure you already know that after living in your mother’s stomach for eight months. Maybe you were hoping if you came early, you could escape, but unfortunately for you, you haven’t learned to walk or talk yet. So you’re pretty much stuck with us. But your mother will make everything less dysfunctional. She always has. Your brother and sisters are all insane, but they’ll protect you with their lives, and we’ll all love you. So you’ll never be alone.” Jaime told his son. The baby wriggled a little in the blanket that he was wrapped in, fussed a little, then settled, seemingly peacefully.

“Are you trying to give this one fair warning, like you did the others?” Jaime looked at Brienne, who looked at him sleepily, with her eyes half open. Jaime grinned.

“Of course. He needs to know what he’s in for.” Jaime said. Brienne allowed a half snort to get out before she simply shook her head.

“It doesn’t work. None of the others ran away from home. You’ll be stuck with the same amount of diapers and bottle feeds as you were with the others.” Brienne replied. Jaime grinned.

“Oh shucks. There I was hoping he’d run off and join the circus and we could skip waking up three or four times a night.” Jaime stated. Brienne just smiled, as she closed her eyes.

“You’re incorrigible.” Brienne stated.

“Would you really have me any other way?” Jaime asked. Brienne shook her head.

“Not really. And you wouldn’t have any of us, any other way, either.” Brienne replied.

“You’re right. I’ll even take the waking up four or five times a night.” Jaime said, making Brienne laugh, as baby Arthur slept on in his father’s arms, completely oblivious to what he was in for, for the rest of his life.

**Author's Note:**

> So... Joffrey has a heart. LOL! I hope that you enjoyed this part and that it was amusing at points. Please comment and let me know what you think. (nods) Constructive criticism is welcome. Insults are not, and shall be ignored.


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